When Loving Them Hurts: Walking With Faith Through a Parent’s Addiction
- Info @
- Jul 1
- 4 min read
“Why Would She Choose That Over Us?”
I didn’t understand it at first.
I didn’t understand how someone could choose a high over a home. I didn’t understand why things kept disappearing from the house, why our money seemed to vanish, or why peace never stayed long. I didn’t understand how the woman who raised me — who laughed with me, held me, sacrificed for me — could become someone I didn’t even recognize.
Because I’ve always been quiet, music became my refuge. I remember getting a CD player and building a collection of songs that helped me escape, even just for a little while. But even that was taken. My mom sold them — my music, my outlet — for another hit.
At that time, I wasn’t angry at her.
I was angry at the drug.
I hated what it did to our family.
I hated what it did to her.
And, to be honest, I hated the people who sold it to her.
But now, years later, I look at all of it through a different lens. A deeper one. A Christian lens.
Addiction Is a Thief — But It’s Not the Enemy
I’ve come to understand something important: my mom didn’t love drugs. She didn’t wake up one day and say, “I want to lose my family. I want to hurt my children.”
She was trapped.
Addiction steals choice. It rewires the brain. It doesn’t just take over someone’s actions — it reshapes their ability to think clearly, connect emotionally, and live freely.
Even now, my mom is no longer on drugs (thank God), but she’s turned to alcohol — her “first love.” And honestly, that can be just as destructive. It just kills you slower.
And while I still struggle — especially when she wants a drink — I’ve learned that anger isn’t the answer. Prayer is.
Faith Doesn’t Ignore Pain — It Presses Into It
As Christians, we’re called to love everyone. But what happens when the one you’re called to love keeps hurting you? What do you do when that “everyone” is your own mother? Or father? Or child?
It’s hard.
It’s deeply personal.
And it’s incredibly complicated.
We talk a lot in church about loving people, but it’s much harder to love someone up close who keeps letting you down. That’s why we need supernatural strength — not just to stay sane, but to stay compassionate.
There are still days when I want to scream. When I want to walk away. When I don’t want to pray anymore. But then I remember: Jesus didn’t give up on me. And I can’t give up on her.
There’s Hope — Even in the Middle of Addiction
If you’re walking through this — watching a loved one self-destruct through substance abuse — you are not alone. And you are not powerless.
Here’s what you can do:
Pray even when it feels pointless.You’re not praying to a wall — you’re praying to the God who moves mountains.
Protect your peace.Loving someone doesn’t mean enabling them. It’s okay to set boundaries and say no.
Release the guilt.Their addiction is not your fault. You didn’t cause it, and you can’t fix it.
Stay open to healing.Not just for them, but for yourself. You deserve freedom too.
God Sees You — And Them
Jesus died for drug dealers.
He died for addicts.
He died for the ones who stole from you.
He died for the ones you can’t understand.
And He died for you — the one still holding the pieces.
There is enough compassion for them, and enough grace for you. It’s okay to feel broken. But don’t stay there.
Call to Action: Let’s Fight in Prayer — Together
If you're reading this and someone you love is struggling with addiction or alcoholism, here’s what we invite you to do:
Say their name out loud. Right now. And ask God to touch them.
Write their name on a sticky note and place it in your Bible. Pray for them daily.
Reach out to someone for support. Don’t carry the pain alone.
And if you are someone struggling with addiction:
There is help. There is hope. There is healing.
Get Help Now – You’re Not Alone
If you or someone you know is battling drug or alcohol addiction, call for free, confidential support:
Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) Hotline1-800-662-HELP (4357) – Available 24/7
Let’s Reflect Together
Who are you praying for today?
What pain are you holding that you need to lay down?
What part of your heart still needs healing?
We want to hear from you. Comment below:
“I’m praying for my mom.”
“I need prayer for strength.”
“God, heal my family.”
We read every comment. We pray over every name. You are not alone.
Final Encouragement
Your story may be filled with pain — but it doesn’t end in despair.
God is still working.
Healing is still possible.
Hope is still alive.
Let your testimony speak louder than your trauma.
Let your prayers go deeper than your pain.
Let your heart remain soft — even when it hurts.
We believe in healing. We believe in family restoration. We believe in the power of prayer.
And we believe in you.
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